The Dating Files: Happiness

About a month ago, when I was in Arizona with one of my besties, I received some tough love from in the form of a stern talk regarding some of my dating choices. She knows me better than most so everything she said was not only completely valid but the kind of stuff that sort of knocks you on your ass and makes you think "ohhhhhhhhhhhh." She said I'm too preoccupied with finding someone funny and that I should stop focusing on that so much. I do admit to a weakness for funny men. I spent four years with a man who wasn't very funny and I swore to myself I'd never do that again. It is of the utmost importance to me that I spend my life laughing. But my friend brought up several good points in regards to my infatuation with hilarious dudes. According to her, I'm quite funny and I love plenty of people who aren't super hilarious but we still laugh together often. And while someone who makes funny jokes is great, for the long haul I don't need a comedian or a joke writer or someone who is going to be performing bits for me all the time. What I need is someone who is HAPPY. And if I find someone who is happy, the laughter will come right along with him.

And I think she was dead on. Happiness is so very important. Not that the person has to be in a good mood 24/7 (although I'm probably one of the few people who wouldn't mind that) but that they are positive, comfortable in their skin, settled and like life. I've spent too much time with men who were basically a few mere steps from miserable and I've decided life is too short. I'm happy and I'd really like to have a happy life so I've decided to try and look for that in the men that I date. It seems obvious now, but it took me awhile to get here. And by the way, I recently went on a date with a happy man and it was incredibly refreshing, not to mention a hell of a lot of fun. I thought to myself "ohhhhhhh, this is what happy looks like."

So here's to happy men and happy weekends. I hope to find both. xo, Amy

{images from LIFE photo archive}